" Why can't I have a
normal boyfriend? Just a regular boyfriend, one that doesn't go nuts on
me!" Remember
that line from the movie "As Good As It Gets?" That was Helen Hunt as
Caroll Connely who said it. One way or
another,we all have this Caroll Conelly moments after several hit or miss attempts
in finding Mr. Right.
Sometimes
you think that you got lucky enough and claim that you got the jackpot,
"He's the one." Yes, I found the him. Then, few months after, you get
the surprise of your life when you sulk in a corner sobbing or whacking your head with the palm of your hand "Damn, what was I thinking?"
Despite the
potential Mr. Right's display of -he's- not- into- you- red- flag- sign, what's
outrageous is that you still relentlessly float on cloud nine with your
delusion that he's Mr. Right for you.
Now what
were you really thinking?
Pursuing
a relationship with Mr. Wrong (who according to your delusion is Mr. Right) is
like jumping in a murky water and expect that water is safe enough to drink.
Now let me ask you again, what were you really thinking?
I know that all of us make bad choices or
simply choices that we thought are good for us but eventually turned out bad
choices just the same. Nobody is exempted. I'm guilty as charged (not once not
twice but for the umpteenth time. Yes, I'm an experienced pro on this one.)
But choices made out of sheer desperation and
impulsiveness to find Mr. Right is downright pathetic and a sign of
hopelessness beckoning. And yet most of you consciously or unconsciously do because
you are desperate to find Mr. Right.
For various
reasons, whether out of self pressure or peer pressure or because of feeling of
bereft, you do things that are out of your character just to turn your personal love conquest into a fairy tale romance spruced up with
happily ever after ending.
Unfortunately,
finding the elusive Mr. Right is like shooting your target in a pitch dark room
where you'll surely end up missing more than hitting the target. Even if you
ask a fairy godmother to twirl her magic wand and send you Mr. Right knocking
at your door with a bunch of pretty red roses, it's still not going to happen
unless the timing is right.You want
that man so badly and you convince yourself and justify that he's the one
when your wit and gut feel agree that
he's not.
So you push to the limit to please him. Call
him incessantly. Send IM messages every hour. Check his FB activities ( almost
like stalking him) stressing out waiting for his call and reply on your
countless messages. Before you know it, there goes your self-respect and
dignity down the drain.
Now, tell
me, is it really worth it? Seriously? I don't think so. Realistically, the flow
of nature directs you that the more you push it to happen the more it's not going
to happen. Whatever you do to lure him in your arms if he is not into you, you'll end up being
frustrated and broken hearted.
I'm not
saying that you give up in finding Mr. Dream Man. The author of the book
"A Bride for Mr. Darcy" Mary Lyndon Simonsen imaginatively claimed “There is nothing sweeter than finding the
right person to love and cherish and to share your hopes and dreams with.”
I agree. But going
overboard is a different story. Don't just grab the wrong man just because
you're impatient to wait for God's special gift for you. Never
compromise and let your guard down at any point. That's when you start
losing your self respect and self-worth.
Love
yourself first. Loving yourself will give you a stronger leverage to bargain
yourself with the man you're longing for. When you are not afraid to conquer
life on your own, your value increases twice as much. There's no need to worry about Mr. Beautiful.
He's as anxious as you are in finding the right one for him.
Trust me. God is a great match maker. He knows
who's the perfect one for you. However, He wants you to be perfect for him too.
So start taking care of your beautiful self so you will be capable of loving
your future man. You are worthy way more than what you think. Your value is
priceless. And you deserve a priceless
value too.
When the
time is right, you'll be amazed that a magical force will bring Mr. Beautiful
to you unexpectedly sweeping you off your feet as forest flowers unfold it's natural beauty. You won't
need an alignment of stars or throw coins to make your wish come true.
Not unless you're wishing for a normal
boyfriend. But be as it may, it's still thousand times worth the wait.
.
