A View From The Top

This may not look like an ideal landscape view for a commercial poster or calendar pictures. But this sight is a view from the balcony of my work place where I usually take a short breather after a hard day's work with the kids. Amazing. Enchanting especially when you see this unfolds in four different seasons. Gazing at this picturesque scene in the afternoon does not only rejuvenate my energies but I feel that its refreshing effect gleams on my face every now and then.

They say that when the going gets tough the tough gets going. And in order to get going, I guess the survivor instinct in us tells us to hold on even to frivolous activity that can possibly release your stress, tension and anxiety through the day. Five to fifteen minutes of distraction from stressful situations can go a long way. Whatever works.May it be playing Farmville, reading messages on FB, polishing your nails, or in my case basking in the afternoon sun at the balcony with this gorgeous canvass right infront of my eyes is more reinvigorating than a short nap. I don't know if it's about the view or is it about giving yourself the gift of solitude

Whatever it is, thank heavens for small mercies.

I'm In The League

Am I scared of the big 5-0? Well…uhmmm aahhmmm…still contemplating.
Seriously, I hope that nobody would ask that. As you can see, I can't even reply a simple yes or no to a simple question.

The truth is, I'm not just scared but terrified of the big 5-0.

Long time ago, when we say you were turning 50, you were expected to look matronly like, more sophisticated in taste and style of dressing,refined choice of jewelries and must be at the peak of your career and laying the grounds for retirement at 60. In other words, reaching the big 50 before means- fun is over, baby. That's the old picture of a 50 year old woman years ago.

However, in this day and age, images and lifestyles of women have evolved gradually and gracefully. When we think of matured women along the late 40s and pushing 50s, we can now visualize a Demi Moore and Madonna look alike with voluptuous body and toned biceps donning a mini-skirt strutting arm in arm with their dates 10 years their junior.

Now this is when I wish I'm 50.

Thankfully gone are the days when people would give a rocking chair, a crochet thread and hook as presents to a woman of 50. (God forgive me if I'll get that on my 50th birthday. I think hell will break lose.)

I'm lucky that I belong to this generation when growing older- ouch! that hurts.
Ok let's sugarcoat this. I mean growing more matured bespeak of embracing more life's adventures without fear, taking risks without holding back and making giant leaps brazenly in the next stages of life. And if this is so,then what's there not to be proud about being a golden girl?

Oh, but for the record, I just turned 48 today. Two years from now, I will officially be a golden girl. And when that time comes, I think the first thing I'll do is to utter a Samantha Jones dialogue of "Who cares what you are, just enjoy it. Or I will wear whatever and blow whomever I want as long as I can breathe and kneel".

But for now, I'll enjoy being 48 and think about 50 when I get there.

Bitten by a Vampire

Yes, I was. Keep those eyebrows down. Ok, not really… I look like I just had a date with Lestat de Lioncourt, (the French nobleman turned into a vampire in Anne Rice's Interview with a vampire) who had a feast on my neck after starving himself for two weeks.

Pallid. Dizzy.Weak. Shortness of Breath. All of these started on Monday evening.

It was kinda odd why I've been longing for intermittent rest after every activity. I know myself since I've been indulging into physical strenuous activities since September especially after I stopped the disgusting smoking habit. My stamina doing badminton, brisk walking, running, samba and weight training has grown by leaps and bounds. So there's no way that I'll experience shortness of breath just by climbing the school's plight of stairs.

However, last Monday evening, as I was pounding my keyboards, I felt a certain light headedness, weakness and almost turned the palms of my hands including my face as white as paper with my arms and legs numbed. Ok I rationalized or fooled myself a little that maybe it was over-fatigued. I slept over it- hoping that it would be better the next day.

But Tuesday, got worse.

I went to school without my usual perky, vibrant mood ( not intentionally though) and told the kids that "Teacher Joy is a little bit sick. Let's play nicely and go easy on me today..." In other words-no shouting, no rough playing and do what you're told by your teacher!" And that solved the problem.

However, I continued to feel weaker like a burning candle losing its flame. And more pallid too- a transformation from a run-of-the-mill computer white paper to the whitest of the white A4.

Quite disturbing, huh? I thought so too.

So right after work, my husband brought me to ER to find out what's going on. A neurologist first ruled out any signs of brain injury or nerve related issues that caused my dizzy spells. After doing a similar to sobriety test (walking on straight line and do what I do) and look-where-my-finger goes kind of examination, she said everything is alright.

Until the result of my complete blood test results sprang up the monitor and voila, my red blood count is low/ my white blood cells are higher than normal.

In other words, anemia! Now, that kind of put my heart in place why I've been feeling this way. I'm still clueless why this happened but later today, my dear husband and I will continue the ER saga to hear what the gynecologist and internist will have to say.

In the meantime, I'm hunting for Buffy, the vampire slayer to help me finish off the throngs of vampires on earth- I can't be a vampire victim for so long.

Who Needs a Doctor, When You Have a Mother

"Mother, mother I am sick, call the doctor very quick." Remember this old time favorite children's rhyme? Whoever composed this three liner rhyme didn't write the word, mother on the first line by mistake. The children's writer knew in his heart that the first person any child would call in times of trouble is his mother.


From babies to adults, we all feel much better whenever we get mom's sweet words of assurance that "everything is going to be alright" whatever predicament we're in-break up of relationship, financial loss, career failure, passed over for a promotion or even as minute as a loosened button on your favorite blouse, there goes mom. Call her and she's the solution to everything akin to a one-stop shop open 24/7.

You need an accessory to match with your dress? She has it. An instant baby sitter for your baby-she'll do it without hesitation. You miss something on your chocolate mousse cake recipe? She'll tell you not only what's missing but the secret ingredient that you should know to make it the most special chocolate mousse cake ever. When you need to vent out your woes and blues, a tete- a- tete with mom over a soothing cup of tea makes miracle wonders.

Good moms are heaven- sent- angels that are just right behind us waiting for our call. Sometimes, they don't need to be called. They jump in spontaneously when they feel needed. You don't even have to utter a word. They know it. They're moms, remember?

Who needs a doctor, when you have a mother?

When I asked my preschool kids what is mother's day? One Chinese girl who's just learning English retorted "Teacher, Mother's Day is Happy New Year to Mommy." Clearly, New Year's Day is a grandiose celebration for Chinese. And by that she meant "Mother's Day is about celebrating mothers. And indeed…it is.

Happy Mother's Day to you mom and to all moms in the world.

A Good Gardener

No, I'm not. Not even close to somebody with a green thumb. As a matter of fact, it's more like I have a black thumb. Withered and dried plants were all what you could see in my small little garden that ended up in the trash after experiencing a slow death even before and after winter.

My husband even called it more of a graveyard than a garden. So to refute his correct impression of a graveyard, I pushed all those pots with dead plants surreptitiously in a corner and covered them with small sacks of dirt on top. Few days after I replanted the pots with new fresh flowering plants then it looked like nothing had happened. Voila! Who would say that I don’t have green thumb. No trace that I couldn't keep plants alive for a long time. Ok that dodge was just my desperate last ditch effort to save my bruised ego and my little garden.

Unfortunately, I didn’t get any of my late father’s magic touch with plants. I remembered how he would rub egg white on the leaves of each plant to make them look fresh and shiny.
He used to grow all sorts of plants from vegetables to flowering ornamental plants and the funny part was that even plastic plants looked real with his care.

Plant needs caring and nurturing hands. I know I'm gifted in that area but apparently not with plants- more with children. But everything can be learned. Soon I can call myself a good gardener. It might take awhile though. Who cares!

In the meantime, I'm basking in the glory and beauty of spring flowers. An Australian writer, Germain Greer once put it "A garden is the best alternative therapy."

And yes, I happen to agree with her.

SPRING HAS SPRUNG NEW HOPES

Finally, winter is over. Aren't you glad that those struggles with icy roads, freezing sub-zero temperature and breath vapor mornings are no longer here? Now it's more like rainy days, chilly mornings, wet sleeky roads, gloomy skies-not my ideal kind of weather but are definitely far better off than the harsh freezing winter months this year.

Spring is in.

In as much as I have always been an admirer of the raving beauty of spring, I know that many people frown on the flaws of it. But hey, don't forget to count your blessings. Fresh canary yellow daffodils and colorful hues of tulips peeking in the neighborhood garden with pale pink cherry blossoms and immaculate white flowers of plum trees complementing birds' melodious chirping on a warm sunny weather- how priceless is that? Don't they just remind you that life offers us more than what we bargained for?

Well, it does to me.

Spring always give us promises that we are oblivious of such as a new hope and bright blessings to spruce up our lives for the rest of the year. It always give us an overwhelming assurance that there is a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow-a prize that we should look forward to at the end of our personal journey and battles.

Sometimes, we may feel downhearted over a career failure, lost of a loved one, broken relationship, financial difficulties or a wrong turn in life's direction.

Here's the good news, it doesn't matter what we bear at the moment. There is someone up there who knows what you're going through. He will finish what He has started in you. And that's His promise.

Just like spring weather, even if it drenches us with occasional heavy rain and covers our days with thick dark clouds, don't fret! There will always be patches of sunlight that will provide a sliver of comfort and cheer for us to get by for the time being until the radiant beauty of the glorious sun unfolds full blast in summer.

Keep your faith in Him. Spring symbolizes a promise of a new beginning...a new hope and a new life.

Enjoy the beauty of spring!

Waiting for Groundhogs

Every first week of February where winter seems to be losing its grip, we make it a point to share an amusing American folklore to children at school-The Groundhog Day.

These rodents, members of the squirrel family are a spectacular sight during the 2nd of February in Pennsylvania. People queue up to witness the groundhogs' final verdict whether winter will stay longer or will be over soon. And how do they know? As soon as they get out of their burrows and won't see their shadows, this indicates that winter days are numbered. However, if result is otherwise, then there will still be 6 more weeks of bitter cold winter.

Today, I went to a mall. No amount of icy rain with snow could stop me from taking advantage of the 50-70% discounts on almost all items at the stores. All stores want to get rid of their winter items. Isn't that a good sign? Not only that it's a heaven sent signal to women to grab the discount opportunity to keep a stack of new winter clothes for next year, but hey, winter items are going and soon will be gone.

This bespeaks, that in the next two weeks, we'll see more spring items, more greenish motif on store window dressing, longer days ( though not necessarily brighter) but at least more light than heavy winter gloom. Hopefully, above zero warmer temperature will soon follow.

Before we know it, it's already Spring! Personally, I'm not a big fan of groundhogs. I don't even know if I've seen one here in Croatia but goggling the results of this spectacle in Pennsylvania if they will see their shadow or not after February 2 is always a part of my to-do-list.

I can't wait to see if I'm keeping all my thick furry jackets and snow boots away or should I buy more of winter stuff for the next six weeks.

We'll see. I'll let you know.