Where Were You Last Christmas?

Don't you just ask yourself every year, where was I last Christmas? I'm not talking about the place where you exactly were last Christmas. But where were you at that point in your life at this time of the year. Were you battling some kind of personal crisis that you successfully overcame this year? Or you were probably in a cross roads of your life where you had to make a  bold decision that thankfully turned out into a right one. Whatever you were going through last year, in retrospect, you look back and breath with a sigh of relief- that was one hell of a year.

A lot of things can miraculously happen in a span of a year. As you chronicle your journey every day. You'll witness the difference a year makes. It is a fact that everything is not permanent. Things change abruptly or gradually even with your physical appearance. You look younger than last year or you see lines emerging on your foreheads. Your psychological makeup can also change in short period of time. You eventually resolve with  a radical paradigm shift onto a new positive outlook in life.You morph from a  person concern about what other people would say  into a new individual who doesn't give a hoot at all.  Either way, you have changed one way or another.

Life evolves. It takes you to places where you have never been.  You saunter , dash, crawl, hurdle or trek through life's challenges. But at least you are moving forward or even  inching small baby steps are still movements. And it will always take you somewhere whether it's moving turtle slow or moving a gazelle like bounding leap.

As long as you don't stay stagnant. Then that's a good sign. Embrace changes as it gives you room for growth. So if last Christmas somebody gave you his heart, the very next day, just don't give it away. That would be too soon for a change. Right, George Michael?

Merry Christmas!

Accessory Anonymous

For women like me who have been hooked on accessories, who never forget to buy a piece or two every time I go out for just window shopping (even  during a self imposed strict rule of no buying for now) this habit could be addictive. In the same way as one gets hooked on alcohol and cigarettes when one promises that this drink or this stick is the last. Ofcourse, it never happens. Once my eyes  fancy on something that sparkles and something that I think would complement one of my attire that I plan to wear for the week, then that accessory beckoning me from afar will already be in my purse in less than an hour.

 May it be a pair of earrings, necklace, bangles or a hair clip as long as it makes me wear something new for the day, I'd jump on it in a heartbeat. I knew that I needed some kind of rehabilitation or more like AA meeting ( Accessory Anonymous) where I'd introduce myself as "Hi my name is Joy. I am an accessory addict." In as much as I wanted to be healed in this area, I couldn't do so as there is no such thing as accessory rehabilitation center and perhaps other women suffering from this type of addiction would be embarrassed to reply "Hi Joy." No woman, in the right frame of mind would admit that she's hooked on the same accessory addiction problem. I think I am the only stupid one who admits this.

 After amassing tons of accessories over time, I wonder what would I do with this pile of dusty rainbow colored personal tinsels that I only used up once or twice  sitting in the four drawers of my closet -valueless and yet I'm still holding on to them like my life depends on it.

My accessories which I consider my personal valueless treasures remind me of how many times I feel good about myself. The joyful moments when I feel so ecstatic about a new event in my life or an expected blessing or just merely feeling accomplished after a regular smooth day at work. The happier I am the more I accessorize. It's weird. Isn't it? But everybody has its own quirks.  Unfortunately, this is my version.

Please don't judge. And I won't judge yours too. Now that as I was doing a summer  holiday  tidying up time, I thought of tossing those that are not used up for long time. But on second thought,

as I was sorting them out, I  vividly remembered the event when I was inspired to pick a pair of turquoise earrings that match with my light blue top that goes perfectly well with my jeweled turquoise bracelet. It goes with the memory that touched my mind that I wore these when I got the job in one of the schools I used to work before.

 The double strand of pearl necklace flashed back memories of my wedding day. In  the same token as  my gold cross necklace reminded me back when I went to the court for my divorce. The apple green pair of dangling earrings was with me when I tripped over and sprained my ankle which losing a pair of earrings was more of my concern than breaking a leg.

As valueless as they may seem because they are not as real as J-Lo's stunning 18 k Emerald Diamond ring, I realized that they are not that valueless at all. They are reminiscent of the monumental events, happy times and missteps I made over the past literally and figuratively speaking.

Clearly, these valueless possessions are not actually good-for-nothing but to accessorize my wardrobe purposes only. They are priceless not because they match with the wardrobe but they refresh memories of my past. And as it turns out, these are the most valuable possession I've got.

So, at this point , I am saying my own version of the Serenity Prayer that goes like this. I am asking God to grant me the serenity to keep the accessories that I can't toss away. The courage to change  old accessories that have been sitting in my drawer for ages. And the wisdom to know the difference between quality accessories and those that are not.

Then I think I will be Ok with one accessory at a time. :)

Things That Matter Most

We usually thank God for healing of physical ailment when our situation seems hopeless, recovery from an addiction when we hit rock bottom, a bright sunny day after long successive months of bitter cold winter, a roof over our heads when we're tired of being a temporary couch resident in a friend's house, food on the table when the fridge is almost empty, meeting a lifetime partner when several relationships failed and ofcourse extra cash for shopping when all bills are paid.

Beyond our basic needs, we tend to overlook at other significant things like doors of opportunities that He opened for us unexpectedly,  people we meet along the way that touch our hearts and  chances we take that didn't make us fall over the cliff.

However, there are things, that are more significant that we take for granted and yet, things that matter most that somehow is greater than the basic needs we often worry about. Here are what I personally count as small blessings and yet important as breathing fresh air.

I'm grateful to God for the golden sound of silence during my alone time  while I amble my  way to work, lounging in armchair in the comfort of my home , the short naps that rejuvenate my energy all throughout the day. The solitude I find when running 5 kms along the busy road, the soft summer breeze that makes the trees sway, a canopy of dainty pink cherry blossoms that brighten up my day, the whiff of freshly baked bread,the loud screams of happy children playing in the garden, the sunrise that reminds me of a new beginning and the sunset that assures that everything has an end and a new day is coming.

These precious moments are ethereal. The alone time that I snatch from my busy schedule gives me the chance to rethink about God's goodness and how His saving grace carried me out from a -would-have-been-catastrophic  repercussions of wrong decisions in the past. God is amazing.

 He always gives us reason to go back to Him  to give Him back the glory for His greatness whether it's the magnificent beauty of nature, a new job or just simply the priceless moments of silence that connects my soul to my maker at any time of the day.

How about you? What do you thank God for?

Love.... Me, I and Myself

Love is not all about sharing romantic moments with your special someone. It's ideal that you get a bunch of red roses, chocolates , having candle light dinner then making love to your partner till the break of dawn or even after that.

But for those who don't have anybody to share these picture perfect moments with on Valentine's Day, don't fret not just because you are not in any kind of a relationship. Valentine's Day is not only about  loving others. It' is also about loving yourself.

Take time to appreciate your accomplishments. Not only in terms of professional achievements and the amount of work you did for the week, months and even for the year. But how you thrive or even just survived the feat against the challenges of life. From losing a couple of weight  gain, to normalizing your life after a break up or quitting smoking is a moment to celebrate yourself.

I know of an old friend of mine who buys herself red roses on Valentine's Day because she feels like she deserves it. And argued vehemently that she doesn't want to wait for a man to give flowers to her.

 Right, she is. There is no limitations as to how you can make yourself happy. You know yourself better than anyone else. You know what will make your day or what will put a big smile on your pretty face.

 Treat yourself for a spa or an out of town trip or even watch a movie at home or at the cinema or simply pour a glass of wine and worry about getting tipsy later. Who cares about getting tipsy on a Friday night, anyway?

Be kind to yourself. You are your self's best friend. You can't love your future partner if you don't know how to love yourself.

As for me, I just prized myself for a quick run today. I breezed through a 6 km run feeling the fresh wind touched my face on a 14 C temperature. Endorphins that kicked in soon after made it so much better. My spirit soared and left me  feeling  good , energetic and joyful throughout the day.

What I feel inside will manifest with how I look on the outside.  I did this because I love myself. If I can do it, you can do it too.

 Nobody would love yourself better than you do.

Happy Love Month!