My Spring Collection

If you’re thinking that this is all about spring fashion clothes collection, well, sorry to disappoint you- you’re wrong. Since Spring is about to end soon and summer is right just around the corner, I figured to post some pictures that highlight why I love Spring.. I know you may have your reasons too. Feel free to share it with me. I would love to see them.

You must have seen these pics on Facebook if you’re my FB friend since I have been posting gorgeous flowers like crazy. But if you haven’t seen them all, here’s something to brighten up your Spring. Remember, Spring reminds us of a new beginning in whatever form that is- maybe a start of a new life, new hope, new relationship or a  new job. It doesn’t matter whatever it is  for as long as it gives us life’s second chance.

A Day in Vienna

What I like about living in Europe is that you don’t only have to take the plane or a train to cross over to another country. Sometimes all you need is a reliable car plus a visa ( that’s if you need one) and off you go.

During my trip to Vienna, a six hour drive from Croatia, I kinda braced myself for unexpected surprise that may come along the way. Not necessarily bad though considering that it was Friday the 13th. We know that anything can happen that can either bring the best or the worst in you.

My main purpose of visiting Vienna was not to sight see and rediscover Mozart’s home country. But to do some official business at the embassy. Since the embassy’s consular services work up to 4 pm only, I was under a lot of nerve wracking time pressure. Thankfully, my friend who was kind hearted enough to drive me from Zagreb to Vienna while I snoozed off was as cool as cucumber. So he kept my strained emotions at bay.

Though he was expecting me to help him navigate through the map ( no GPS in his car unfortunately. I agreed at first but uhmm there was only a slight problem, I don’t know how to read maps. I turned the map upside down and then turned it sideways just to see where we were but I couldn’t find it. So, I got a better idea. I slept in the car so I got a good excuse.

We arrived almost past lunch time. As soon as we reached there, it was crunch time. We’ve got only approximately 2 hours and a half before closing. We were given instructions by a friendly and nice Turkish businessman who owns a Jewelry Shop to park the car and go by tram and subway to our destination.
That’s when the misadventure started.

We bought tram tickets but we didn’t know where to get off until we asked a pleasant old man to help us which stop we need so we could catch the train heading to other side of the town. He mentioned U-ban which is an equivalent of a subway. Then the train has a diagram of stopping points where passengers can glance for guidance but the Austrian names that are as long as their Frankfurters are not only tongue twisting but confusing as well. So after stepping on a few wrong platforms and asking more than 10 people for directions, we finally made it to the embassy and did what I had to do.

Now the challenge after that was how to get back on the street where we parked our car. Then tracing back how we came in was like having a feeling of Hansel and Gretel tracing back the trail of bread crumbs in the woods to reach home. Along the way, we had encounters with different pecular reactions from people on the street as we asked for directions in macaronic language- German, English and Croatian.

We even had a bizarre encounter with a middle aged lady, reddish watery eyes obviously wasted since she was holding a can of Heineken who stopped my friend and moved her face closer to his- stepping on his personal space like she was about to kiss him. Then with a very soft voice she whispered something that made my friend react and said “ Oh so you have a secret?”

Then the lady raised her voice a bit and said “No, I said, do you have a cigarette?”
Then we understood what she meant and in fairness to her, she gave us directions as she slurred.

Finally, we reached the parking space area and felt it was close to home when we saw the car. Two cups of coffee and short stroll after, we got back to the car and found our bread crumbs again drove out of Vienna…Gratz…then Maribor ( Slovenia) and finally Zagreb.

It’s good to be back home.

Stop and Smell the Flowers

On the way to my appointment, I passed a huge park situated at the heart of the town center. My attention was caught by a tree filled with blooming dainty white with a tinge of lilac flowers-all over the tree crown.

It was at the height of its bloom which is why petals fell on the ground like a bed sprinkled with rose petals. But, it isn’t rose petals this time but magnolia. On the tree you can’t even spot a green hue since there was no single leaf but only pure flowers.

It was a breathtaking sight to behold. Since I had some extra 30 minutes left before my appointment, I sat down on a bench next to the tree and indulged my eyes with the amazing beauty of nature that God has bestowed on us. I couldn’t believe that I was staring at the real scene and not just a downloadable computer wallpaper.

Instantaneously, I felt that my stress level was reduced not a smidge but by half level at least. No matter how busy we are, it’s really worth to stop and smell the flowers.

Thanks, But No Thanks to Big Erasers.

I think this is the biggest eraser I’ve ever seen. I found this one few months ago in a bookstore. I grabbed it at once (and took a picture of it with my smartphone. ) I wasn't sure if I'd need it. That's why I didn't buy it.

But a little voice inside my head kept whispering like “don’t you wish that you could erase away all the mistakes you made in your life with this pink rubber eraser?”

Hmmm …. Well, ofcourse , don’t we all? We hope that wrong decisions, inappropriate reactions or unintentional bad actions are mistakes that could be wiped out in one sweep. Like as if it never happened, right?

Whenever we make an unwise decision, it may be a failure in a relationship, a bad choice of words, a wrong career path or may be as trivial as wrong brand of clothes softener, we always say with regret that “I should’ve done this or I should’ve done that instead”.

We blame ourselves or better yet, do everyone’s favorite thing to do, blame others. In my case, I blame others less but do the opposite more. I beat myself up spending sleepless nights with what-in-the-world-was-I-thinking?!

Until my unconscious miscalculation keeps on niggling at the back of my mind as I over analyze things or situations that I could’ve done better.

Ok I’m guilty because what I’m doing ( blaming myself) is not far better than blaming others. Although I’ve to say that blaming others is more fun than blaming myself.

However, on a hindsight, mistakes happen for a reason. It makes our perspective wider when we look into other directions for possible options to rectify what we’ve done wrong. In the same vein as, this brings us down to our knees and seek God’s guidance seriously ( knowing that the bigger the blunder, the more serious we are with our prayers, right?) so He could show us a lesson or two that He intends us to learn from it.

In other words, making mistakes should be perceived more as a boon than a bane since it molds us and fortifies our character with strength, resiliency and humility.


So, who needs big erasers anyway? Well, for sure, I don’t.

How about you?

My Love Affair with Mr. Wolf

Since it’s Valentine’s Day, I deem that this is the right time to reveal the secret love affair that I kept three years ago. Yes, I had an enchanting love affair with Mr. Wolf that lasted for six blissful years.

I thought I couldn’t live without him. Every single waking day, he was the first thing in my mind. I couldn’t sleep without thinking about him. I always remember how after dinner I’d dash to call him right away. There was something about him that made my heart jumped all the time.

At work, I couldn’t wait to take my break. I often sneaked out and sauntered gingerly to meet Mr. Wolf at our rendezvous place. I didn’t realize that Mr. Wolf meant to me more than I ever imagined. He was the best friend I never had. The confidant that never judged. The lover that kept me craved for more. And the companion that was always available for me anytime of the day and anywhere I wanted. I was completely enamored by his irresistible charm.

And yes, Mr. Wolf is hot. If that’s what you want to know. It’s true. I openly admit that I was completely in love with Mr. Wolf. But wait a second, it’s not what you think it is. I’m talking about Walter Wolf- long filters packed in golden flip top case in full flavor.

This is all about my nicotine addiction that lasted for six years before I kicked off the filthy habit. If you think that the long challenging journey to a smoke free life is as easy as a pie, then think again. The truth was I had to win over the battle over cigarettes every single day. It was more like a tug-o-war between me vs. myself. Everyday brought a new hope that I’d stop and give my tired worn out lungs a fresh new pinkish color. I relentlessly persevered thinking that French proverb “Rome wasn’t built in a day.”

Whenever I failed to keep my commitment to myself, I always mustered the tenacity to do it all over again the next day. So, basically, I learned to live one day at a time.

Would you like to know how I did it? Here’s how I made it happen.
When I moved to live in Southeast Europe, my stress level of adjusting to a new country embracing a different culture skyrocketed. On top of pressures of living in a foreign land, the language barrier was the biggest cause of my headaches- groping the meaning of Slavic words which consisted of more consonants than vowels gave me more stress induced skin problems ( it isn’t easy to harden up your tongue with the Russian sounding rolling R, let me tell you.) This is why I found myself lost in translation in countless occasions.

I got introduced to a culture where smoking is widely acceptable, approved with two thumbs up and considered almost the norm in the society done by equal number of males and females. Everywhere you look people smoke. It’s either you go against them and get a second hand smoke or you join them and be a part of the smoking community. Either way, you’ll get it.

However, being formerly married to a professional smoker, by professional I mean consuming a pack and a half a day) didn’t help at all. On the contrary, it even encouraged me to take up this new formed habit seriously until I finally made a career out of it since we considered this as something we enjoyed doing together equally romantic as a dinner by candlelight date. We smoked together before and after a meal and whenever we felt the adrenalin pump kicks in the middle of suspense thriller like “Final Destination”. Then my ex-husband and I had to pause DVD to take a Walter Wolf breather at the balcony to calm down high wired nerves and to guess who the next victim is or who’ll kill who.

At work, things were no different. During my 30 minute break, my smoking buddies went to a special place we mused as holy ground that we named “Mr. Bush”- not after the former US President, George W. Bush. But it’s more like a reminder of “The Burning Bush.” Yes, literally it’s a thick bush hanging over a corner house’s garden fence. Hence the name. This spot, a stone’s throw away from the work place is where we ensconced ourselves and exchanged smoke rings while we vented out our personal issues. It’s more like headquarters for girl power movement or an informal street psycho therapy -in my case with my beloved, colleague, Nancy who never complained listening to my woes and blues. So imagine during four seasons rain, drizzle, scorching heat, heavy snow or flurries we showed our unwavering loyalty to Mr. Bush. There we worshipped the burning bush with our full flavor smokes. Aahh who cares about storm, hail or avalanche!

Smoking was not only a golden habit for me, but more like a part of my daily routine from the moment I started my day with morning coffee (The best time to get my nicotine fix. Ok not only the best time but are you kidding? caffeine plus nicotine? That’s an explosive combo) until few hours before I went to bed.


The unbreakable routine that didn’t respect any reasons for a total halt
stayed with me even a month after I got hospitalized with Pneumonia. I was so in love with Mr. Walter Wolf that no amount of sickness could break us apart. Actually, we stuck together in sickness and in health like a real husband and wife who pledged faithfulness till death do us part (well, in the case of a smoker, that’s what’s going to happen anyway.)

I had been going through the same struggles until two years after, the desire to quit became stronger and ofcourse harder. I started to loathe the stinky smell on my clothes, hair and breath and the wheezing sound in my lungs before I went to sleep. In other words, the smoking ghost started to haunt me every single night.


I got so desperate and mustered the courage to try everything including alternative untraditional methods just to get rid of the filthy habit.
First the book, Allen Carr’s “Easy Way to Stop Smoking”. I read the book slowly so I could digest every word. Memorized some lines. Highlighted striking sentences with marker. Bookmarked the last page read, then after, I went lighting up a stick again. I’m not saying that the book is not effective. It is. As a matter of fact, I’ve learned a few tricks from it too. But I was so anxious to do things the fastest way.

Second attempt was the quota for the day method. The first quota I set for myself then was 3 sticks a day. Proud like a peacock, I was telling everyone loftily with heavy denial that “I’m not a smoker”, which I wished that I had worn a T-shirt saying “I’m not a smoker instead of convincing everyone the lie that I put in my head. What are 3 sticks anyway?! It’s not much. But when I recalculated, ok, 3 sticks a day multiplied by 30 days in a month that’s solid 90 sticks a month! Holy Smokes, that’s a lot! I stifled nervousness and feigned fake confidence. Focusing on the 3 and ignoring the 90 by choice.

Ofcourse, as time goes by, 3 a day didn’t stay 3 but 7 then progressed to 10 and from 10 to 15 then 18 on regular days and during stressful days 20- which is actually 18 ( since I refused to count the 2 to fool myself that I was still consuming less than a pack.) But in reality, I’ve gone over and above the quota of 3 sticks. It’s now a pack. At this point, I was officially on the professional level.


So who was I kidding here? Ok you don’t need to answer that. I endured heavy consternation and the humdrum Math exercise of counting cigarette sticks on a daily basis. Something that I could have used for my preschool class for Math practice with sum up to 20. Seriously, it daunted me since it has slowly affected my physical health.

On top of this, I started tossing and turning and having some nightmares-waking in the middle of the night in cold sweat and dreaming about quitting smoking. The more I went through this at night, the more I smoke during the day. It was being agitated about the thought of quitting smoking and consequently, I smoked more.
How ironic, huh? But it’s true.

This went on and on for a few months until one day, somebody handed me a CD on Hypnosis- Stop Smoking Within One Hour by Susan Hepburn a renowned psychotherapist in the UK.

Like a curious first timer in hypnosis, my fear was not to be able to snap out of it. Though it was a self-hypnosis without the guidance of a professional in white coat dangling a pendant right on my face while I lie down on a couch. I didn’t know whether doing hypnosis on my own is a better idea than with a trained professional. But at that point I didn’t care.

Surprisingly, it was utterly as easy as a walk in the park. All you have to do is to follow instructions in the same way as you follow simple directions from a packet of instant noodle soup and voila!

And so I did.

After going through the whole nine yards, I opened my eyes dreading the real litmus test, to see how effective the hypnotherapy is. They say that the proof of the pudding is in the eating. So I followed my ex husband (now and my ex smoking partner too) to the kitchen the moment he lit up.

I was hoping for fireworks to happen to create some kind of magic to kill the cravings so I wouldn’t grab a stick and light up. As it turned out, no sparks of magic was needed at all because there were no cravings and no urge to smoke at all. The most amazing part was I never felt that I was a smoker.

It felt like I was unshackled instantly and gained an indescribable liberation from a bad habit that was eating up the whole me.


Living a healthy smoke free life for three years now is such a pure joy. This month, I’m celebrating my brand new life. Thanking God for using the person who gave me not just a CD but a gift of life. I thank God for reminding me that my father who died of lung cancer would’ve been the happiest that I did it.

It’s amazing how I got the chance again to breathe and smell the clean whiff of fresh air, appreciate the palatability of food and the real taste of strong espresso coffee again. Aaahhh, life is not only good.


It’s way a lot better than that.


Though I miss Mr. Wolf’s unfaltering fidelity to me everytime I think about him, but I’m not sorry to say that my love affair with him is over. We had shared lovely unforgettable time together. But the good times are over. I enjoyed every moment until I puffed my last.


Happy Valentine’s Everyone! Enjoy a smoke free life!

Thumbs Up and Thumbs Down List for 2011 Part II

Sorry it took a few days before I released my thumbs down list. I just needed some time off to take down the tree and finished up left over food and ofcourse and to vegetate after the New Year frenzy.

Here it is now, the second part that I promised-my thumbs down list for 2011

1.Touch Screen
My friends keep on telling me that I’ll get used to touch screen. Ok, after using this phone for more than a month now,I am still not used to it. I don’t have a fat finger problem. But my problem is more on how hard I press the screen especially whenever I send text message and chats. It seems like the keys on the touch screen ( by the way I’m using HTC Wildfire S) are too close and the spaces are not enough for my finger to press a letter. And you could just imagine how one time it ended up like a disaster when I rushed and typed the word “clock”. That ended up as “cock.” Nice!


2.Spending Christmas Alone
Worst thing ever. This is a double thumbs down for me. The spirit of Christmas is joyous season to be with your family. But spending it alone (either because of some personal or work related reasons) will somehow make you feel the blues of the season. If you’re a home alone hater like me during Christmas, it’s sensible that you should try to attend to Christmas parties to boost your morale a bit instead of joining a pity party which I did and wasn’t even dressed up properly for it.


3.Break Up:
Gee, breaking up before Christmas is a very bad move. I know it’s inevitable and nobody schedules a breakup with your partner. Like“ honey, how about we postpone our split- up since it’s just weeks before Christmas? Can we just make our breakup one of our new year’s resolution for 2012?”

Two of my friends had a bad breakup months before Christmas. Don’t ask how their holiday went like. No amount of presents, parties and movie marathon cheered them up (ok shopping did- only temporarily though. Thankfully it did!) Basically, having friends who are heart broken during the Christmas season, made me discover a second career for myself- a Christmas mascot. For interested parties, booking is six months in advance.

4.No Internet during Christmas holiday
You gotta be kidding me. No internet during this time of the year is like having the urge to smoke without cigarettes. You’ll be irritable, sweating, struggling with headaches and swearing a lot. When all your friends, colleagues and family are on Facebook, it’s the easiest way to reach out to them and give them your Christmas greetings at the convenience of your home. Ok I know you got Facebook now on our phone. Say what you want to say but it isn’t the same as you are on the computer. If you call technical services of your network about your internet problems and you get a we’ll- fix –the- problem- after -the –holiday- response then you’re doomed. It’s like having a toothache during the two week Christmas holiday and all dentists are out for a vacation. Then, you’ll just have to take your chances on any type of pain reliever. Good luck!

5.Food Pushers
What may be acceptable to you may NOT be acceptable to us. That’s the beauty of cultural diversity. We are all not the same. Our cultural practices vary and depend on where we come from. In some countries like in the Philippines, we show guests hospitality by offering our native delicacies. We put food on the table and allow the guest to choose which ones he’d prefer to eat (ofcourse we don’t push duck embryo to our guests.) We don’t want their government to put a travel ban to the Philippines because of that. But here in Croatia, it’s the exact opposite. Hospitality and warm acceptance are exhibited by getting into your plate literally especially by the old people ( who know the art of blending the taste of Sarma-stuffed sour cabbage.) What they’d do is push you to eat what they’d put on your plate. And you’re expected to finish everything or else they’d get offended if you don’t. I know they mean well, but I never got used to food pushers. Next time, I encounter food pushers, I’ll pout. If that doesn’t work, I’d pretend I got a tummy ache.


6.Bourne Legacy

I’m an avid follower of the Bourne book series. What precipitates my adrenalin to pump up while I read is the visualization of Matt Damon as Jason into the story. Unexpectedly, the soon to be released film Bourne Legacy later this year will not leave any legacy without Matt Damon in it. I’m not saying that this upcoming movie will not be spectacular( haven’t seen the trailer yet.) I’m sure it will exceed or at least a little bit closer to the previous sequels. However, viewers like me, associate Jason Bourne with Matt Damon for years. And it’s not going to be same with a different persona.

But hey, a good movie is a good movie. Let’s wait and see if Jeremy Renner will be at par with the only Jason Bourne I know.


Now it’s your turn. Tell me what’s yours.

My Thumbs Up and Thumbs Down List for 2011

Have you discovered something new about yourself this past year-those things that you love and can’t live without and those stuff that you can’t even stand leaving you puzzled why in the world did you hang on to those in 2011?

Ok, it’s almost the end of the year, when you sit down in the little corner of your room before midnight- few minutes away from the first day of 2012 while you do your New Year’s eve self assessment routine, it won’t hurt to contemplate on some new revelations like an epiphany ( not likely coming from heaven) about yourself that you thought you knew but actually didn’t know about until you got the chance to discover it only last year.

It may not be something significant though. It may just be some minute part of your everyday life but matters a lot.

I can’t wait to know what’s yours. But before you tell me your list, let me burn your ears first with mine. You ready? Here goes…

Thumbs Up List

1.Latino Parties:
I’am a sucker for latin dances but two particular dances that make my heart beat faster in a bossa nova rhythm are salsa and samba. Who cares if the rest of the world are sleeping? All I care about at Latino parties are Mojitos, samba and lots of hip shaking and grinding with sultry Latino friends who dance to their heart’s delight. Oh, did I mention about hot Brazilian bartenders?

2.Facebook’s More Than Just Happy Birthday Greetings
When it’s our birthday, it’s a known fact that the first thing we do is to look at our Facebook wall, right? Ofcourse we’d like to see who remembered us on our birthday.

But how could this birthday routine be exciting if all we see is “Happy Birthday, All the Best!” or just simply “Happy Birthday” or worse “Happy B-day”. Therefore, if you’ve got 25 friends who remembered you on this day, all you’ll see is a “Happy Birthday” repeatedly written 25 times on your Facebook wall. Gee, that’s exciting!

How about writing something nice about the birthday celebrant? Write something that’s encouraging, or say something about a person’s good traits, write something positive. Oh, for heaven’s sake! Write something that’s more than just “Happy Birthday!”

3.Scented Candles
I used to dread opening Christmas gifts before especially when I could feel that what’s inside are candles. Until I got smitten by L’occitane candle fig scent (again a gift to me) whose seductive scent can throw you down on the floor.
That’s when I got a paradigm shift about candles. From that time on, I always ask my friends that I’d like to get scented candles for Christmas. What can I do? Things change!

4.Bubble Bath
My new bubbly passion. I didn’t have the chance to have bubble baths before since my old apartment didn’t have a tub but just a bath corner shower stall instead. Now that I’ve got one in my new apartment- ha! I make sure that I always give myself reason why I do so-to relax my muscles, to calm me down, for a good night sleep, to try different bubble bath soaps. I don’t run out of reasons just to do it every other day. In case I do, run out of reasons, I’ll make one for the next day.

5.Caramelized Almonds
Gosh, I’ve never thought that this stuff are so delicious. Ok probably because I got sweet tooth. But really, they’re addicting that once you munch one sweetened almond, there’s no way for you to stop until you wipe out the rest in the jar. But let me give you a caveat, they’re harder than you thought. So those with porcelain caps, be careful.

6.Running
Since when did I start to like running? Three years ago, I guess, when my goal was to simply substitute smoking with running. But this year, I don’t just like it. I love it! Doesn’t this sound like a Nike slogan? Running to me now is more than just good for my body- it’s good for my soul too.

7.Jelly Babies
Ok from running to eating sweet high caloric jelly candies? They don’t go together, right? But you know what? I don’t really care. Jelly Babies are the best gummy candies I’ve ever tasted. Taste is perfect. Sweetness is just enough for my once in a while cravings ( ok sometimes more than once in a while) but the shapes? Well…uhmm, let’s just put it this way, it’s like your chewing sweetened little babies. Eewww!

Don’t ask me. I didn’t make them.

8.Ask and It is Given -Law of Attraction Book ( self- help skills) by Abraham- Hicks
Powerful book that everyone must have. When I started reading it, I couldn’t put it down. I was hoping that I won’t reach the last page since it has revealed tons of information that I missed before. The book generally endorses the principle of law of attraction where you can attract what you desire ( or in the same token as attracting negative things or events as well) depending on how you direct your thoughts.If you get the chance get hold of the book. Go and get one for yourself. It’s a good read especially during the beginning of a new year.

My Thumbs Down List for 2011 will be posted tomorrow. Stay tuned!
While I’m ending the first part of this blog few hours right before 2012 begins.

Let me wish all of you, ( my dear blog readers) a life rich in love, peace, good health and abundance of blessing for the Year 2012.

I hope that I could see you more often here and that my blog would always be worthy of your reading time.

Happy New Year to all!